How to avoid apologizing.

I've noticed lately that I'm averaging about one apology a week.  Minimum.

You see, I tend to be a little blunt. 

I also tend to think that I'm right - a lot. 

Turns out, I'm not as right as I think I am on a regular basis.

Imagine that.

Proverbs 12:18 says "There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing."

You see, when I just pop off with whatever runs through my head, I'm jabbing my friends and family with a sword.  I'm hurting them with my thoughtless words.  I'm being inconsiderate.  And I'm definitely not showing God's love to them. 

When I overhear my boys fighting, I always ask them to check their words.

Is what you're saying nice?  Is it necessary?  Does it glorify God?

You see, not everything that we have to say is going to be nice.  Sometimes, there are hard situations to face and those words will be necessary.

Sometimes, in the heat of the moment, I do feel that what I have to say is necessary.  I need to tell someone exactly what I think of them and the situation or I will explode!  Which means there's probably nothing nice in what I'm about to say.

But the standard that I have to measure my speech comes from number three.  Does it glorify God in my saying it?  You see, this is where I really need a pause button.  To stop and think before I speak. I need to ask myself if by what I'm saying, am I bringing others closer to Christ or driving them away?  When they see me do they say "I wish I had what she has (Jesus)" or do they say "If that's what Jesus does in her life, she can keep Him, I don't need that".

Psalm 19:14 is my prayer for my words:

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.



Originally posted at Woven.

Quit Comparing!

In the past few weeks in Bible study, we’ve been talking about worry and comparison and condemnation, as well as a few other topics. And driving home tonight, it made me realize that sometimes, when I read other blogs, I feel like everyone else has it all together. Like I’m faux Monet. From far away, everything looks great but up close it’s a big ol’ mess.

So I’d like to tell myself - and all of you - stop it. Just stop it. We all need to quit comparing ourselves to what we see on Facebook or Pinterest or other blogs. We need to quit comparing ourselves to the families that we see on Sunday morning at church who "have it all together". There’s only one person who should be our yardstick for how to live and that’s Christ.

So in the interest of being completely transparent and making sure you understand that just because I home school and garden and can and whatever else I choose to show you on this blog - understand that I do not have it all together. I don’t think that I ever will.

There are many Sunday’s that by the time I get to church, I really need to be in church because my whole family has made me stark raving loony trying to get ready and bad words have run through my head. There are days when I feed my family eggs and toast for dinner (again) despite my menu plans and Pinterest boards full of great meal ideas. There are days when the boys run around the house in their underwear all day (I don’t mind those days - it’s less laundry for me). I even once gave my boys Slimfast and a Fiber One bar for breakfast because I was running late for work and had no time. There are days when, by the time Ronnie gets home, I feel like I have been water boarded for the past eight hours and I just want to run away.

It’s OK. There are no perfect moms. It’s OK to admit this. We don’t need to be perfect. We don’t need to push our ideals on others or tout our accomplishments for the purpose of making ourselves feel better (and sometimes making others feel worse). What works for me won’t necessarily work for you and vice versa.

We need to understand that there is grace, not just for the big stuff, but for the small stuff too. Quit beating yourself up over your failures. Just stop. Take a big breath and realize that God’s grace is enough to see each of us through this crazy life we live. Quit comparing yourself to someone else’s ideal and just be the girl God has called you to be.

There’s really nothing better.

Passionate Living

Stubborn. 

Why do I have to be so stubborn?

Wouldn't life be easier if I just listened the first time? 

For a while (ok, a long while) God has been nudging me.  Wait, not really nudging, more like pushing. 

Hard.  Really hard. 

You see, I've been spending the past decade saying the right things and living the way I knew I was supposed to but I lost my passion. 

Before our daughter Grace died, I was passionate.  Passionate for God.  Passionate for His presence, for His word.  Passionate to let others know how much He loves them. 

After we lost her, I was so angry.  I felt betrayed.  Somewhere along the line, I began to think that it was my passion that led to her loss.  Like by being passionate, I had painted a giant bulls eye on my back.  And while God & I eventually worked things out and I let go of my anger, I think I subconsciously started flying under the radar.  I prayed, I read my Bible, attended church - I've always loved God.  But it wasn't that whole hearted, passionate, can't wait to be in Your presence love.  It was easier than putting everything out there just to be hurt.  It was safe.  It was just enough to keep that bulls eye off my back again. 

I was kind of a hot mess, right?  But here's the thing.  God loves hot messes.  And while I was playing it safe, He continued to passionately woo me, just as He always has and always will. 

2 Timothy 1:7 tells us "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and love and of a sound mind". 

You see, my job is but to passionately love my Lord and speak what He tells me to, remembering that He is trustworthy despite what's going on in my circumstances.  I don't need to be afraid.

The enemy can attack, but he can not win.

He can't steal away my passion.

Don't you know?

I am a daughter of the King.

And my Daddy won't stand for that.



Originally shared August 12,2013 at wovenministries.blogspot.com

My new favorite devotional.

Remember when I shared with you about The Dig?  We really enjoyed that as a family devotional, but unfortunately we're done with it and volume two hasn't been published yet. 

Not to worry!  Look what I found:

 

We bought The Action Bible for Joshua last year and it was a complete hit.  I often find him in the corner of the couch just reading to himself from this Bible.  He loves the comic book layout.  I was so excited when I stumbled upon the devotional based on it. 

 

It contains 52 weekly devotions divided into the following sections:

• An illustrated story from the Action Bible
• A key verse.
• X-ray vision:  Thoughts to connect the story with your life.
• Your Mission:  Three ideas to put the theme in action.
• Your Debrief:  Three questions to spark some brain cells.
• Mission Accomplished:  Space to make some notes to remember.
• Share the Adventure:  Ideas to involve friends.

It also has occasional pages where you can write, draw, cut & paste - whatever you want to do to be creative. 

 

We are loving it.  We do a little each day, as well as doing our verse for the week. 

 

One thing I do want to make clear is that The Action Bible and it's devotional are great resources, but they aren't what I consider a real Bible.  We still sit down and read the story for the week from our real Bible.  Any work that we do for school is also done from our real Bible.  However, this is a great resource.  It has my kids more interested in reading great Bible stories than about superheros.   To me, that's a homerun. 

 

I picked mine up from Amazon for around $12. 

 

 

 

1 Corinthians 13

Now, I know not everyone who reads my blog is a homeschooler, but I think applies to all moms.  Take a minute to read this. 



1 Corinthians 13 for Homeschool Moms

If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and teach my children Latin conjugations, Chinese and Portuguese, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal, and no matter what I say, they will not hear me.

If I have the gift of prophecy, and know my children’s bents and God’s plan for their lives, and know all mysteries and all knowledge,and am the keeper of the teacher’s editions and solutions manuals, and if I have all faith, so as to move mountains, and even keep up with my giant piles of laundry and dishes, but do not have love, I am nothing, even if all the people at church think I’m Supermom.

And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and my formal dining room gets turned into a schoolroom and our family vacations look more like educational fieldtrips, and if I surrender my body to be burned, never having time to get my nails done, put makeup on or even take a bath, but do not have love, it profits me nothing, because all my family cares about is the expression on my face, anyway.

Love is patient with the child who still can’t get double-digit subtraction with borrowing, and kind to the one who hasn’t turned in his research paper. It is not jealous of moms with more, fewer, neater, more self-directed, better-behaved or smarter children.

Love does not brag about homemade bread, book lists, or scholarships and is not arrogant about her lifestyle or curriculum choices. It does not act unbecomingly or correct the children in front of their friends. It does not seek its own, trying to squeeze in alone time when someone still needs help; it is not provoked when interrupted for the nineteenth time by a child, the phone, the doorbell or the dog; does not take into account a wrong suffered, even when no one compliments the dinner that took hours to make or the house that took so long to clean.

Love does not rejoice in unrighteousness or pointing out everyone else’s flaws, but rejoices with the truth and with every small step her children take in becoming more like Jesus, knowing it’s only by the grace of God when that occurs.

Love bears all things even while running on no sleep; believes all things, especially God’s promise to indwell and empower her, hopes all things, such as that she’ll actually complete the English curriculum this year and the kids will eventually graduate, endures all things, even questioning from strangers, worried relatives, and most of all, herself.

Love never fails. And neither will she. As long as she never, never, never gives up.

Misty Krasawski, December 8, 2008

Found at Encouraging Beautiful Motherhood

Past vs. Future

When I first saw this on Pinterest, it immediately took me back close to 13 years ago.

You see, I grew up in the same church I attend now.  But, unfortunately, I took a decade long sabbatical - so to speak.  Not only did I not attend my church, I completely walked away from God.  I would boldly proclaim that I was an agnostic, I had a mouth that could make a trucker blush and, well, to keep it polite - let's just say I was lacking when it came to morals. 

My life today is truly a an example of God's mercy & grace. 

So, back to my little sign here.  About the same time I came back to the Lord, I also moved and changed jobs to another local hospital.  It was actually nice to be able to meet people who didn't know the old, loud and crass me. 

Until that day.  I was working in the ER, and had been working there for a few weeks, when someone who knew me before was working that shift as well.  I really didn't think anything of it.  I just was chugging along, doing my thing.

And as I rounded the corner to the nurses station, I overheard this person letting everyone there know how I really was.  What I was really like.  Things I had done. 

I stood there for what seemed like an eternity, horrified at what was being said.  And praying for the right words, I stepped into the conversation.  Letting everyone there know that what was being said.... was all true.

But here's the great thing.  I was able to tell everyone there what Jesus had done for me.  I was able to let them know that He loves me despite my past.  And not just me, but all of us who sin - that His grace is there for us each and every day.  That kind of opportunity doesn't come along often - especially at work.

We each have a past.  And while it's nothing to revel in, it's also nothing to hide.

Every saint does have a past.  Every sinner does have a future. 

Thanks to the overwhelming love and grace of Jesus.

Boldly Go.

The Invisible Woman

Seven years ago....

Seven years ago today.....

I was in the hospital hoping beyond hope for a good outcome.

It was the end of one journey - of daily casting my fears on the Lord.

And the beginning on a new journey - one of daily relying on the Lord for strength.

Seven years ago today, we welcomed our son Joshua into the world.  I thought my heart would explode with joy. 

You see, Joshua was my 9th pregnancy.  My second delivery.  And my first child. 

And while I've learned many (many) things since having Josh and his brothers, the lessons I learned during this struggle have stayed with me:

• God is faithful.
• God is not scared by my anger at Him.  He's a big God.  He can handle it.
• God is always with me, even when I don't feel him. 
• He loves me with an overwhelming love, despite my past.

So today, as we celebrate the birthday of my sweet not-so-little boy,  I remember God's faithfulness.  His mercy.  His love. 

I am blessed beyond measure. 

Homeschool witnessing.

Please take a moment and hop over to my friend Audrey's post about homeschool witnessing.

 Wow.

 It really hit home for me.

Beautiful Feet

I love a good pedicure.  There is just something about all the scrubbing, massaging and polishing that makes me feel great.  Especailly during flip flop weather, which for me is anytime I don't think my toes will frostbite. 

Now, my feet aren't beautiful.  Well, not in the traditional sense of beautiful feet. 

Don't get me wrong, I rub them with good smelling lotions and paint my toenails.  I even have special cream from the dermatologist to keep them nice and soft.  But that doesn't give me beautiful feet.

Not the beautiful feet I want anyway...

Isaiah 52:7
"How beautiful upon the mountains
are the feet of him who brings good news,
who proclaims peace,
who brings good tidings of glad things,
who proclaims salvation,
who says to Zion,
Your God reigns!"

These are the beautiful feet that I want.  That my words are God's words, proclaiming peace and salvation.  Letting the world know that my God reigns.

Those are beautiful feet, indeed.

make my words right.

My friend Audrey is allowing me to share her post today from her blog Everything Beautiful.  Audrey is a talented young lady with an adorable set of twin boys.  I'm frequently amazed by her wisdom and heart for God.  When I read her post yesterday morning, I was overwhelmed by the truths it contained.  I pray all the time for my boys safety, but, in my life, if God had kept me safe and protected from all the hurts of my bad choices, I wouldn't be serving Him today.  I hope you enjoy it as much as I have.  Please check out the link below and thanks for stopping by.

make my words right

Thoughts about Sunday.

I'm sure most of us are aware of the Ten Commandments.  You know, Moses....Exodus....Israelites....the Big Ten list of rules. 

I think about these commands, or rules and it's just like with my own children.  The rules are for my own good.  My life will be easier, more peaceful, happier - if I would follow them.  Now, obviously, I do pretty well with most of them.  I haven't killed anyone recently, I'm faithful to my husband, I don't use the five finger discount when I'm out and about. 

There are a few that I do struggle with more than others.  And if your honest, there's at least one that you'll admit is probably a struggle for you also.

Remember the Sabbath, to keep it holy.  Exodus 20:8.

Sunday is considered our Sabbath.  The Sabbath should be for our worship and our rest.  Why?  Because, God knew that we need to recharge.  We need rest.  It's not good to be constantly working, whether at our jobs or projects at home. 
Yet, how many times do we use the weekend, including Sunday to catch up on our week?  It seems like such a relaxing day.  An obvious choice to get some work done after church. 

Sometimes I think we view this commandment as a "lesser" commandment.  We think "I'm not going to kill, steal, or be unfaithful"  But mowing the grass on Sunday or going out to eat, or hitting the grocery store...really, what's the harm? 

The point is, it's still a commandment from God. 

Believe me, I am not on a soapbox here.  I really struggle with Sunday commitments.  I love to go out to eat after church.  I've been known to hit WalMart after service to pick up a few things and maybe even lunch at Subway.  But when I check out, I think to myself...if I wasn't here supporting this business right now, would the clerk or waitress have had a chance to go to church today?  Maybe they really needed to hear God's word and be around someone who could show them God's love.  What kind of witness am I leaving with them by shopping here today? 

In reality, it's not that much work to throw something in the crock pot before church or even cook ahead and warm up leftovers.  Why not use the day to reconnect with  family?  Have a friend over.  Take it easy. 

It is for your own good you know.

Facing my fear.

We had gone to the Outer Banks about 8 years ago.  So when our friends called to invite us to go again, I knew what to expect.

I remembered the lighthouses and the wild horses. 

The beautiful, natural beaches and the dunes.

And the tunnel. 

The dreaded, underwater tunnel. 

I hyperventilated eight years ago while riding through this tunnel and now I was faced with taking my children through it.  Seriously, I considered not going just because of this tunnel. 

Running a close second to the tunnel....bridges!  Not just any bridges - long bridges that seemed as if they were sitting on top of the ocean with big hills in the middle of them. 

That seems to be a common thing when you choose to vacation on an island.  Seeing how it is an island.  You know, land surrounded by a body of water.  That kind of island.

So, what to do?  I knew we would never have an opportunity to stay for free at an oceanfront beach house anytime soon.  I knew that the boys, especially Joshua, had been hounding me to go to the beach for two years.  I knew that a vacation was something that we all needed. 

I knew that while I'm great at spouting off the perfect "church" answer to other peoples problems or quoting just the right bible verse for a situation, this situation would make me face the real deal.  My fears.  As unrealistic as they may be.

I'm afraid of tunnels, and bridges, and small spaces.  There, I said it.  And instead of "growing out of it" or getting better at dealing with my fears with age, I was actually getting worse. 

I packed my only, lonely Xanax that I had left over from an MRI on my shoulder two years ago.  I was ready to face the tunnel.

Then, it happened.

Have you ever been listening to the radio and had a song stuck in your head?  That's what happened to me, only I wasn't listening to the radio.  On the nine hour drive down, one thing kept popping into my head.

 "Fear not, for I am with you

do not be dismayed, for I am your God;

I will strenthen you, I will help you'

I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Isaiah 41:10

When the time came, I drove through the tunnel and over the bridges.  And while, in the interest of honesty, I did still take some deep breaths and white knuckle the steering wheel - I made it.  And I did it without pharmacological help.

I love that I serve a God who cares so much about me.

Irrational fears and all.

Why do I keep comparing?

Have you ever noticed how thoughts can creep up on you?  It's not like I've ever woken up in the morning and thought "Wow,  today is the perfect day to covet!"  That's not how it works.  Our thoughts wander, little by little, to places they shouldn't be. 
Ronnie & I both had very good jobs B.C. (before children).  And to be honest, we were not frugal back then- we liked new things, we like eating out, and that was fine.   Fast forward 6 years & 3 kids later and things are a little different.  I don't work full time at a demanding (and well paying) job.  I am a full time wife, mother, teacher, and homemaker.  And I know I'm right where God wants me at this time in life.  Yet, I still have to remind myself that it's not about shiny new toys like campers or Kindles - my items of covet this weekend.  So I come home.  I ask God to forgive my poor attitude.  I pray to desire Him more than these temporary things.  And I remember that I am here "for such a time as this".  I am here to be the best daughter of the King, wife to my husband and mother to our children, that I can be - with God's help.    And that's a pretty great "thing".
Have a great day!
Charli
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  Jeremiah 29:11

Good Morning Girls Summer Kick-Off!

Here's the link to the Sally Clarkson book at Women Living Well/Good Morning Girls.


Good Morning Girls Summer Kick-Off!

For GMG's NOT Participating in the Summer Book Club

Here's the link for Reshaping it all. I decided to join in on this one as I was eating peanut butter pie from Apple Annie's last night. (and yes, it was delish!)

For GMG's NOT Participating in the Summer Book Club

Summer Reading List

I'm trying to be more realistic this year about my summer reading goals. I always make an outrageous list of what I'm going to read this summer, and end up failing miserably. This is my final list for summer.

Creative Correction by Lisa Whelchel
Reshaping it all by Candace Cameron Burr
Ministry of motherhood by Sally Clarkson
Lies homeschooling moms believe by Todd Wilson
OAMC Family Favorites cookbook
Bringing up boys by Dr. James Dobson (audio book)
Finish the Esther bible study.


I'm planning on listening to the audio book with Ronnie on the way to the beach later this month. I've already started Lies homeschooling mom's believe - loving it! I'm starting an online book club/bible study with Courtney at http://womenlivingwell-courtney.blogspot.com/ for the Ministry of Motherhood and Reshaping it All. As far as the cookbook goes, I've been wanting to try once a month cooking for a while now. I already cook large batches and freeze extra from time to time, but I'd like to be more consistent and actually try for 1 baking day and 1 cooking day a month. I'll let you know how it goes.
I'll post the links if anyone would like to join me for the online book clubs. If your interested in making our own Good Morning Girls group, let me know. It's basically an accountability group for our devotional time. Check it out and post a comment or send me a FB message if your in.

Have a great day!